Avengers 2012

I love Joss Whedon and when I knew he was going to direct The Avengers, I expected the same irreverent brilliance of Firefly or the subtle romance of Angel or even the intricate plot play of Buffy. But what we got was a straight out superhero movie. Now is that a bad thing? If it wasn't Joss Whedon, I would have said no.

We had already been introduced to Thor, Captain America and ofcourse Ironman (and Black widow in Ironman) while each of these movies were good,. it felt like a lead up to the avengers, so my expectations were immense. Now I am going to divide this review into  tow parts. Here's why.

1. The first day, first show of the movie(don't ask me what all I had to do to get tickets and then only in the worst theatre in Chennai, more of that later), I had to walk out 3/4'th of the way. Life and career interfered. And when I walked out, let me tell you, I was vaguely, ok I admit immensely dissatisfied.  I know he was trying to establish the different characters, maybe even bring about a sense of uncohesiveness (is that a word) but it felt forced. We see Loki stealing the tesseract (infinite energy source) messing up Hawkeye and the scientist guy from Thor's heads and Nick fury (whistle, whistle) trying to bring the superheroes together. One plus point is that he hasn't tried to make the movie easier for non fans, but i wanted more banter, more fun, more ....I don't know.....masala!

2. Then I booked the second time in Sathyam Cinemas and thank god, because - what a difference! Entire scenes became clearer and there were little points that I missed in Inox because of the dirty, dark screen. This time too even with the massive improvement in viewing pleasure I wasn't very happy except with Mr. Bruce Banner (I looouuurve you Hulk) and then the 3/4'th I had missed came, and I was happy. Very happy. Because Mr. Whedon redeems himslef in the final portion of the movie, we get everything we wanted and more with a huge splash of big and green!

7/10


PS: Public Service warning: Never ever watch movies at Inox, the screen dirty, the projection is horrendous! You will not realise it until you watch the same movie in Inox and Sathyam. The difference is massive! In Inox, faces are blurred, the screen is dark and above all, because the image is so unfocussed and blurred, you can even miss out plot points!

Netherland Joseph O'Neill

There are very few authors who can transfer a characters emotion on to the reader. Recreate the feeling so well, that you find yourself breathing the very same atmosphere as the protagonist, Joseph O Neill has done this and much more.

We follow Hans back and forth, almost literally as the novel highlights his displacement, in New York around 9/11, his wife's home in London and his own childhood in Holland. His estrangement with his wife, the distance with his mother, his own lethargy, his feeling towards his child with an undercurrent of Chuck Ramkissoon - a friend? his boatman through the purgatory? We are never too sure.He takes Hans through immigrant New York, through shady deals and Hans discovers ethnic food, driving license horrors and of course cricket.

I am not a cricket fan, and though the prose was especially fine, I got a little bored with the descriptions. May appeal to a cricket fan. All in all, a great read for a rainy afternoon, if you have those where you come from.

6/10

Murder on a Side Street Salil Desai

I had just finished reading a short story collection co authored by this guy and was bemoaning the fact that even Indian authors use western pop culture references. Then I came across this book and I must admit the main reason I bought it was the extremely low price and the word murder on the cover. I needed a brainless timepass break and I got it. With Indian pop culture references, very few, but they were there!

The story follows a group of 'friends' who meet in a 'cafe' - Ok the similarity ends there. They are couples found in most corners of modern India. One of them is accused of murdering his foul mouthed boss and arrested and ofcourse the rest of the friends try to investigate and clear his name. There are cliches abound, and the only thing that keeps you reasonably interested are the suspects and two or three of the friends, especially jerry and his girlfriend, each etched out rather well for such a no-brainer story. And following in the best Agatha Christie tradition, the least possible suspect is the murderer.

6/10

7 Arivu 2011

Where do I begin?
7 am arivu, roughly translates as 7'th sense. It should have been named the 7 nonsenses. I feel for Murugadoss, he had a fantastic plot. A great idea inspired from a may or may not be south Indian called Bodhidharma ( not proven yet, check wikipedia) and a great connection to modern day India and it's red neighbour. But he decides that since he is the director he has to do everything (direct, dialogue, story and screenplay and even appear onscreen) with devastating results.

The first portion starts of with great promise. Surya in the Pallava era is yum yum yummy. The only distraction is that Muragadoss takes a leaf out of Goutham Menon's book and goes for the easiest route - Narration. Ok, we suspend disbelief and bask in Surya's expressive eyes and six pack, or was it eight? and beautiful locales. Then we return to modern India and here the 7 nonsenses start one after the other.
Spoilers Galore!

Nonsense 1:

We are the sineese. We speak like the Bangalis and look like the Assamese.
All the chinese officials speak English at their official meetings.
We hab to keeeel her.
Then there is the state sponsored Bio war on India. Wow, Mr. Murugs do we really need to escalate hatred, when everyone else is trying just the opposite? And who do the Chinese hire - Shaolin Mind bending monks who are actually Thai ofcourse!


Nonsense 2:

Girl, you have a beautiful voice when you sing. Stick to it. Acting - well Kamal Haasan's acting genes and your mummy's grace genes have yet to be activated, try lying in a water tank for a few days. Cos that's the brilliant thing you do to activate Bodhidharma's dna as a final year Bio Engineering student.
Yes, heights of educational nonsense. A final year project that is the envy of the world, never done before yet can be done with a tank of water, ECG machine and an injection on the spine sourced from Apollo pharmacies while eating food from Nilgiris and speaking on Aircel cellphones. If only our educational system was this good!


PS: The item girl /backup dancer should not wear the same dress you wear in a song before you. And I have the same Biba salwar you wore, same pinch, for once I'm the fasion trendy! and change your stylist.



Nonsense 3:

Dont language lickass, that regime is long gone, even if they produced your movie.Especially if you give one of the most englipeess peterrr accented heroines, a sutha thamizh support speech after some unnecessary monkey/donkey insult is hurled at it. Then you make it a bharani paatu (for the uninitiated - a litany of cuss words)




Nonsense 4:

Yes we have to bring in the directors politics in a sci fi / fantasy /romance movie and make some long winded, confusing statement without naming the country or the guerilla organisation and then give a meaningful pause at the end while the audience scrambles their mind to find out what was just said.

Then the putting the females down. For  moment I thought I was in an Illai Thalapathi movie. The girl rejects boy and suddenly the entire female species is a fooking biyyatch!



Nonsense 5:

24 is long gone, we dont need those backward countdown on black background to distract from already maddeningly distracting movie.


Nonsense 6:

6 a)The mindfucking with a glance was taking to lengths until it became the sole plot forwarder. The only reason I didn't walk out of the theater after the 28'th time it was used, was because of the guy doing it. He was as hot as Thai curry and as cool as ice kachang and tragically yummier than redhead Surya.

b) And a whole police station is massacred, a whole junction full of cars demolished and nobody investigates!

c) Final fight scene among maple leaves!!





Nonsense 7:

The biggest nonsense in the movie, the one that takes it to another level of nonsense. The nonscience!
Director of the hits, please. You were making a movie with a plot that totally hinges on the science, in a state known for its engineers and scientists (who are all settled abroad of course) then please hire a science consultant, or even a first year BSc science student, they will tell you, you were so wide off the mark that even the Hindu Makkal Katchi will scoff at your theories. Dude, you shot in IIT, you should have just asked a passing nerd to fill in the gaps. All he would have needed in exchange was a look at shruti haasan's discarded underwear, bra strap or something.


PPS: Now there were bits of sense, like the time the villiciousness kills the fast track guy. The ordinary gutter cleaner and college girl doing what passes for Shaolin king fu - great and ofcourse, poor Surya who tried so so hard, but his hair colour will be remembered more than his role in this movie. Again - Brilliant choice of villain hotness.

3/10 mainly due to the nonscience.

Johnny English Reborn 2011

Rowan Atkinson, please stick to Mr. Bean.  The movies drags on without a clue whether it wants to be a bond movie or the spoof of one. Rowan Atkinson meanders through the movie wondering whether he is on a Bond movie set or a Mr. Bean one. There is a token black guy, Gillian Anderson looks over botoxed and Rosamund Pike (doesn't she look like Audrey Tautou?)looks pretty dumb. Sorry, pretty and dumb.
Miss it unless you are a hardcore Mr. Bean fan.
2/10

Drive 2011

This homage to 70's or 80's style movie making with the neon pink opening credits and Ryan Gosling as the hero left me disoriented for a moment, trying to adjust to a whole new aesthetic where Ryan Gosling was a action hero, pink neon was acceptable for a macho movie and the dark ,slow pace was in store, rather than the quick, in your face, move or die movies that we have today.

Ryan Gosling is a getaway driver, stunt driver, mechanic and loner. Shown beautifully in that order without three complete sentences being spoken. Carey Mulligan is Irene, his neighbour, mother of Benecio and wife of Standard, currently in jail. Again shown in that order with minimum fuss and maximum effect. They start spending some time together and soon the driver is part of the little family. Shannon (Bryan Cranston) is the father figure mechanic/manager who has big plans for the driver. Borrowing money from Bernie (Albert Brooks) and partner Nino (Ron Perlman) to fund a car to race with the driver. The bluish days and almost sepia nights pass and the characters build up slowly. Then a small conflict appears, the husband returns from prison. Loving and repentant. We wonder where these beautifully, slowly carved characters are sliding down to. Sliding down they are, the mood of premonition is strong. Each shot is like a story in itself. If I have used the word beautiful too much, it's too less. The husband is beaten up by some goons to whom he owns money and now think they own him. They want him to rob a pawn shop or else...Driver helps because he knows the violence is going to spill to the mother and child. Whatever build up the characters had, shatters, yet we want more. The film progresses in an unpredictable orchestra of silence and violence.  Foreplay, but with S & M overtones, the masochistic audience opens up with the smooth caresses, the silences and the thrill of repressed aggression then BAM! Blood and brains splatter around to animal screams, it slaps us in the face, we turn out of breathe, yet we want more. And each time we think the climax is approaching, the veil of aggressive silence falls back again. Albert Brooks is brilliant, Christina Hendricks in a small yet memorable role (I'm partial to her curves, mostly hidden here) Carey Mulligan does a competent job, the kid is cute and not irritatingly so, the only down side being Ryan Gosling who looks slightly uncomfortable, but we know is at his very best.

9/10

Plugged - Eoin Colfer

The writer of Artemis Fowl and the gutsy sequeler of Hitchhikers Guide to the Galaxy, you know you will have a good time reading Mr. Colfer. So did not hesitate paying the 10% money and lending the book. It was funny and hard to believe and the romance was more in lines of 10 year olds who pull the pigtails of the girls they have crushes on, but all in all fun.

Dan is an Irish, ex peacekeeper who works as a bouncer at a bar/casino/prostitution hellhole. There is a lot of guns and fighting involved and a fair bit of irish mockery. But somewhere along the line you feel the writers voice, a very low esteemed writers voice wondering if all this working. People are shot, the hero saves the day, then he does it again and then again. And it all ends happily. Somewhat.